I’m excited. My 8-year-old grandson Luca has taken up cross country running and I’m looking forward to joining him on training runs and local 5K races. We’ve already got one booked for October. As one who didn’t discover the physical and therapeutic benefits of running until college, my vision is that Luca develops a healthy habit that he can sustain well into adulthood.

I’m equally excited about the opportunity to be a supportive and positive voice, a thought that motivates me to keep up my own running regimen and healthy behavior. Boosting my thrill is research describing the importance of male role models for boys and the positive impact produced by loving fathers and grandfathers.

Yet, with all this positivity, my thinking is tempered by a rapidly emerging consensus that boys today are at risk. It’s a point with implications for not only grandfathers, but fathers, uncles, stepdads, foster fathers, coaches, teachers and any man in a position to make a positive contribution to the life of a young man.

Turns out, my personal interest in bonding with Luca in a new way comes at a time when the well-being of boys is being labeled a crisis. To me, this represents a call to action for men of all ages to do our part to help shape the future of the boys in our lives. It’s a call that can impact boys while conveying benefits to the men who get engaged.

Defining the educational crisis boys are facing

According to the American Institute for Boys and Men, boys are struggling at school and have fallen well behind girls in academic achievement. There is a 14% gap in school readiness between boys and girls at age 5. Boys have lower grade point averages than girls throughout their K-12 educations. Boys are less likely to take advanced-placement courses and less likely to graduate high school. Women make up the majority of students on America’s college campuses, a gap of 15% between young men and women.

It gets worse. AIBM also notes that in the average school district, boys are almost a grade level behind girls in English language arts (there is no gap in Math), and that the risk of suicide is four times higher for boys and young men than their female peers — and has risen by 40% among younger men since 2010. The severity of this problem prompted Melinda French Gates to announce funding for AIBM earlier this year as part of a gender equality initiative to better help boys achieve as highly as girls.

Provided Image/Louis Bezich

Louis Bezich with his grandson Luca.

Beyond educational achievement and suicide statistics, the difference between boys and girls has additional implications for a boy’s health and well-being. The American Psychological Association says that “the implications of the disparities between boys and girls are huge. Doing poorly at school is strongly associated with major challenges later in life, including addiction, mental and physical health problems, and involvement with the criminal justice system — problems that also have ripple effects on society at large.”

A piece published in the Columbia Political Review in 2021 suggested the poor state of U.S. boys can be traced to the American educational system, which perpetuates gender norms that overlook the harm that they inflict on boys. Predominant among these stereotypes is that boys misbehave more. That has translated into a number of concerning outcomes which constitute the crisis.

The outcomes, the article states, include a high rate of failing grades, boys comprising the majority of students labeled as learning disabled, and a dropout rate 40% more frequent than girls. All of this because boys have a propensity to misbehave and consequently are more likely to be punished and receive harsher treatment. Further complicating the gender disparity is a creativity crisis in which girls outperform boys in schools that overvalue obedience and disincentivize creativity, because social norms categorize girls as more submissive. 

The article concludes that children are being groomed to be submissive to authority rather than developing independent thought. Further, it argues that this culture of obedience has doubled the rate of ADHD diagnosis in boys. A failure to accommodate students with behavioral problems has resulted in misdiagnosed boys placed in decelerated learning environments.

Potential solutions to the crisis

Richard Reeves, a scholar at the Brookings Institute, is the president of the American Institute for Boys and Men and the author of “Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do About It.” He believes that gender gaps exist between boys and girls (and men and women) in both directions, and that efforts at gender equality should extend to boys and men. 

Reeves believes that there are specific actions that educators can take to close the gap between boys and girls. They include “redshirting” boys by having them start school a year later than girls, recruiting more men (especially African American men) as teachers, and generally getting more men into female-dominated jobs in health, education, administration and literacy while continuing to increase women’s participation in STEM fields.

The American Psychological Association’s Task Force on Boys in School echoes Reeves’ thoughts on redshirting and offers additional school-based initiatives to advance the wellbeing of boys including hands-on interactive instructional methods, more recess-type breaks in the day for kids to be kids, talking to boys about how they interact with friends, and developing listening and relationship building skills.

A call to action

I’ve given you the insights of experts on the crisis facing boys today. They are extensive and while I haven’t explored the extension of these conditions into adult males (a subject for a future column), they are equally troubling and present a completing argument to act immediately to stop the growth of these problems among boys.

While our educational systems carry a big burden to change the culture of education that has fostered this crisis, we as parents, grandparents and male stakeholders can play a role in this equation as role models providing a positive influence and as advocates that recognize the challenges boys face and push for change.

To bring this discussion back to the personal perspective from which it started, think about the boys in your life. Find a way, whether through sports or other activities to create a bond and see how they’re doing. Don’t assume all is OK because they say so.

No, I’m not suggesting that you act like a drill sergeant to probe and push for a download of the child’s life. Just try to get to know them a little better and see where it takes you. It might just be the best thing you did for them — and yourself.

Louis Bezich, senior vice president and chief administrative officer at Cooper University Health Care, is author of “Crack The Code: 10 Proven Secrets that Motivate Healthy Behavior and Inspire Fulfillment in Men Over 50.” Read more from Louis on his website.