The word “lickspittle” is one of my favorites in the English language.

It’s a derogatory medieval term first deployed in 1586 by a professor named John James Gryneus, who wrote of “flatterers which did lick the spittle of Dionysius the tyrant and said that it was sweeter than the sweet wine.”

So, it literally meant someone willing to lick the spittle off another person’s lips and tell them it’s sweeter than sweet wine, however awful that person may be.

In modern parlance, it’s come to denote a fawning, sycophantic, brown-nosing toady who gushes insincere flattery for personal gain.

Which brings me neatly to Omid Scobie, the weirdly pale-faced, heavy-eyebrowed little weasel who makes a living peddling constant garbage about the Royal Family on behalf of the world’s most disingenuous victims, Meghan and Harry.

His last book, Finding Freedom, was a laughably one-sided tome designed to make his pet royal renegades look like unimpeachable paragons of integrity and virtue, and the rest of the Royal Family a disgusting bunch of callous treacherous racists.

Until Scobie came along, I never thought I’d see a worse defender of the indefensible than Comical Ali, Saddam Hussein’s ludicrous ‘Information Minister’ during the Iraq War who boasted that American “infidels” were killing themselves “in their hundreds” at the gates of Baghdad – as TV viewers could literally hear US weaponry loudly destroying Iraqi forces in the background.

But Obsequious Omid makes Comical Ali seem like a bastion of veracity.

All you need to know about him is that he can’t even be honest about his age.

In 2020 told journalist Andrew Billen that he was 33, when in fact he’s 38.

He then tried to lie about his lying, insisting he never told Billen his false age, until Billen confirmed it was all on tape.

“That was unfortunate and naive of me,” Scobie told The Times this week. “You live and learn.”

Hmmm, do you, Obsequious Omid?

In the same Times interview, he said he never uses private jets until the interviewer said she’d seen a recent photo of him on his Instagram showing him on a private jet.

“OK, that was a private jet,” he admitted. “But that was only going from LA to Palm Springs. It was very short.”

Only a little lie then!

The damning photo was swiftly deleted from his Instagram.

Why does Scobie’s fork-tongued bulls–t about his own life matter?

Because it goes right to the question of his credibility as he publishes another book, Endgame — spewing yet more lurid, largely unsubstantiated claims about the Royals that once again paint Meghan and Harry as heroic, bullied, disrespected freedom fighters battling a vile and decrepit institution intent on destroying them.

For the past week, there’s been a constant drip feed of damaging revelations from both the book and Scobie himself on his promotional tour.

He says, without producing any actual evidence, that Prince William’s a hot-headed, power-crazed, scheming gossipmonger who colludes with the media.

He blasts the Princess of Wales as a vacuous, cold, woman burning with jealousy about Meghan and too scared to do anything but pose for photos.

And he accuses King Charles of being a stuffy and inept old man, so entitled he makes staff iron his shoelaces.

All of which, according to my own well-placed royal sources, is utter nonsense.

And I believe them, not Scobie.

Why?

Well, because he lies about me too.

In the book, Scobie states as fact that Queen Camilla and I “enjoy regular chats on the phone.”

But the truth is I’ve never had a single phone conversation with Her Majesty in my entire life.

He also says that “when Piers called the Duchess of Sussex ‘Pinocchio Princess’ and then a ‘race-baiter’ on ‘Good Morning Britain’ … it was Ca­milla who quietly thanked him for defending the Firm.”

This, again, is a lie.

I had no contact with Queen Camilla in that period whatsoever.

I did with some other members of the Royal Family, as I said at the time, but not Camilla.

Scobie just read what I said, and wrongly guessed it was Camilla.

So, given everything he says about me in the book is false, forgive me if I take the rest of it with a dose of putrid old suspicious salt too.

Of course, some of his material – from my own information – is accurate, and my suspicion is about where he got that stuff from.

For example, he includes specific details of letters exchanged between Charles and Meghan after the Oprah Winfrey whine-a-thon in which she claimed there were “concerns and conversations” with members of the Royal Family about the color of her unborn son’s skin.

Scobie says the letters name the two royals involved who supposedly expressed their “concerns” but writes that he cannot name them legally.

If those names are who I think they are, again based on my own very good sources, I find it impossible to believe either of them would have ever expressed any racially- motivated ‘concerns’ about the skin colour of Meghan and Harry’s baby.

But while Scobie would run into legal problems in the UK if he named them here, there’s nothing to stop him revealing the names in America, where he would be protected by the First Amendment covering free speech.

The reason he won’t is because he knows he’d ignite a firestorm of fury, and almost certainly provoke the royals concerned into publicly denouncing these wicked racist slurs for which Meghan’s never produced a shred of evidence.

Instead, like Meghan, her cowardly lickspittle chooses to smear the whole family with alleged guilt by association.

But who told him the names of the people named in that letter?

We know it wasn’t King Charles, so that only leaves the other person involved in the letter exchange: Meghan.

Of course, she and Harry have denied any involvement in Endgame, as does Scobie, though he admits: “I have mutual friends with [Meghan], and that definitely helps with getting information and breaking details.”

I wonder who those “mutual friends” are?

Particularly as I seem to remember Meghan also claiming that she had no involvement with Finding Freedom.

Then, later, while in court and under oath as she sued the Mail on Sunday for privacy invasion, she was forced to admit that she had emailed “briefing notes” to one of her aides ahead of his meeting with Scobie.

In other words, she lied and was a key primary source for the book.

So, on balance, I think I’ll wait for Meghan’s next appearance under oath – which may come quite soon in her legal battle with her half-sister Samantha – before believing her latest denials of any involvement, direct or otherwise, in this latest book.

But what is undeniable is that Obsequious Omid is intent on causing as much damage as he can to a Royal Family still reeling from the death of their matriarch Queen Elizabeth II, and on self-promoting and enriching himself in the process.

All while we’re supposed to believe Meghan and Harry are keen to build bridges with the royals and even want to spend Christmas with them at Sandringham, which seems about as likely as me being invited up there to pull a festive cracker.

I can’t speak for Charles, Camilla, William or Kate, but if two close members of my family had spent the past few years trashing the rest of us on global media platforms, the only way I’d want to spend Christmas with them is if they were human chestnuts roasting on my open fire.

Harry would do well to heed the warning of Dionysius the Tyrant who was left a broken man by his constant warmongering and got finally bumped off by his own fed-up family.